Fall 2007

Vol. 2

Issue 4

The Pax Press Newspaper

Memorial Page

From The Desk

Articles Tiles

The “Reformed” Catholic Church?

Oxymoron or Holy Paradox

By Fr. Michael Abair

     I gather that I do not speak for myself alone when I make reference to the difficulty many of our sisters and brothers in the Catholic faith have when met with the term “Reformed Catholic.” The influx of questions and remarks of confusion became a part of my life from the very moment I was ordained and continues; doubtless perpetually. Met with affirmation and curiosity at times, I also found many of these inquiries to be quite condemnatory or explicitly berating. With little hesitation, it has been clear to me that the temptation to engage in “battles of condescension,” however “strong in a position,” is to ultimately create loss on the part of both parties; matters of faith being so clearly distinct from any kind of “debate team model.” As a Christian people we bear only the armor of Christ – which in the eyes of this world are meaningless- and it is only in this spiritual armor that we authentically defend our faith with the singular most powerful weapon at our disposal: the Love of God manifest in Jesus Christ. 

     Hardly a stranger to the Roman, Anglican or Orthodox Traditions, I refused – and continue to refuse – to allow the pillar of the Catholic faith which is my own to be “dismissed.” Neither, however, will I meet ignorance with anger. Rooted in charity, speaking the language of the RCC has been an experience of sharing what I have come to call my spiritual home as invitation to dialogue and the willingness to meet opposition, ignorance and hatred with “no-thing” save charity; but in paradox – with everything – the greatest of theological virtues and the identity of God himself: LOVE.

     A dear cleric friend of mine from within the Roman Church, incited with clarity a perception that is held by many with regard to independent Catholicism and moreover to “Reformed Catholicism.” “How can you call yourself Catholic when you are reformed,” chided one of his colleagues with a dismissive laugh, “better to call yourselves the Church of the Oxymoron, or better yet oxymorons. While he did not mean a grave offense to me given the tone of our very candid relationship and: I speak quite freely about the “good” Father’s very creative interpretation of his religious vows and those of his brother priests! I will not be dismissed even in jest. Hence the corresponding need to meet such a false perception with a reality; The Reformed Catholic Church – far from the “oxymoronic”– is Holy Paradox. How is it that we call ourselves both Catholic and reformed? We do so both in keeping with the Tradition and in following the movement of the Holy Spirit as we journey as a pilgrim people in communal discernment.

     The answer in itself is paradoxical. We are not breaking with Catholic Tradition insofar as we are reformed; rather we are keeping with the Tradition of the Catholic faith which has been undergoing a process of reform since her inception. Laughter ceases with these statements in dialogues of this nature and – with the grace of God- a genuine listening ensues. What are we doing? We are doing what the Holy Spirit has prompted Catholics to do since the first Pentecost – only a beginning – and continues to prompt us as Catholics to do today: to constantly re-form our selves,  with the passing of the age,  so as to be the foundation of faith that is a rock to weather any storm and to support any historical shift in consciousness. It is in this way that we continue to BE CHURCH, grounded but never stagnant, ancient but ever relevant, solid but supportive of the malleable elements in every given stage of human progression historically.

     I ground my articulation of the Reformed Catholic Church, and her rightful place within the tradition theologically,  in the form of a thesis with the fundamental premises drawn from the Catholic Tradition;  particularly taking note of its earliest forms and clear moment of self-declaration as the “[Roman] Catholic Church,” Sacred Scripture and in witness to the undeniable work of the Holy Spirit manifest in the fruits of the international ministry of our reformed Catholic faith. What follows is an essential summarizing of core aspects which underscore the authenticity of our reformed Tradition.

     To the dismay of many a Roman apologist, the words Catholic and independent are not incompatible [i.e. the capital “C” denoting distinction of context as understood/applied by the Roman Church] whereas the words catholic and independent are very much so. From the period which we may call the post-resurrection age in the birth of the Christian Tradition, we derive – long before the establishment of the Catholic Tradition as we have inherited it- a series of texts which provide a surprisingly simplistic record of the nest of Christendom in its infancy. Among the earliest of these texts, the Didachae was an essential manual describing Christian worship. This text, along with the works of the Early Church Fathers*  written long before the “Catholic Tradition” would be uniquely qualified, are the primary sources available to us from the period of time nearest the resurrection and ascension [“events” as termed by biblical scholars and Church historians] of Jesus the Christ. They bespeak, in opposition to covert teachings drawn from a variety of mystery cults and sects which were deemed heretical, of but one faith: a truly catholic – and hence “universal” faith. The faith of the earliest catholic and orthodox tradition we lay claim to today, along with our sisters and brothers of other institutionalized forms of the faith in its present state, is that of the followers of Jesus of Nazareth. This was a catholic faith without “Roman” preface or qualification. From this period in the Church’s history we have derived one holy, catholic and apostolic church indeed.

     The contextual reality, however, makes it quite clear that historically, what we have come to inherit as THE Catholic faith was not the singular expression of Christian worship. The cradle of the early Church was a nesting of the Tradition gradually; however,  in order to establish the growth of this nested infant as THE Church would take several hundred years. Divisions, sects, off-shoots, cults and fairly large scale religious movements were vying for primacy and singularity from the beginning. The Catholic Church, in its gradual institutionalization therefore, was fundamentally a movement of both a declaration of independence and the commitment to re-form the core articles of faith with the passing of the centuries in the forms of the Councils, etc. We draw lines of apostolic succession from this developed and defined Catholic Church as well.

     Where the history of the Tradition becomes most interesting to the ecumenist or any who would claim “ownership” of Christianity, we look to the Council of Nicea in the year 320 A.D. It was not until this period, and under the hand of an Emperor for the sake of political unity, that the Catholic Church would be instituted as the singular, orthodox and qualified faith. What we may derive from this is perfectly clear: the Church Universal – given over to countless disagreements in her development – would necessarily become THE Church qualified. The Church would become the Church of the Roman Government instituted as the first Independent Church in the history of the evolving Tradition. THIS was the Church which first named itself by association, location, canon and doctrine. THIS was the Church dependent upon no other by the claim of its own authority to establish itself and to become  – in its independence – the Catholic Church of the present [Roman or otherwise]. 

     This matter proves difficult for the Roman apologist or any other challenging the notion of an ecclesial body that is both Catholic and independent, insofar as more than three hundred years of a Church catholic had come to pass before the first statement of dominance and independence was issued; issued from the origin of what came to gradually be understood unambiguously the Roman-Catholic Church. From this point in the history of Christendom, the newly established Church of the Roman Empire entered into that process of interior reformation which continues unto the present day. So too, in various forms prior to the major schisms,  within the Church herself, rivers would continue to spring from the initial pool, forming specific religious communities – each under the general rule of the Church – with particular charisms noting distinction and catalyzing interior reformation; a process that has never ceased in the Roman Church. 

     Was there ever a truly universal community of faith? Indeed, there was. Was this Church that which was built upon the vision of Constantine? A documented history of the post-resurrection, Ante-Nicean [before Council of Nicea in 320 A.D.] and patristic [relating to the early Church Fathers] period of Christian worship lays forth the answer that it was long before what is called today the “[institutional] Catholic Church” that the faith was practiced in a truly catholic, undivided sense of the word.  The declaration of being the qualified, singular and independent Catholic Church certainly needn’t lend itself to a contemporary criticism of an act of autonomy dating back nearly two millennia. What history can provide for us, however, is living proof that insofar as the evolving Catholic Church of 320 A.D. was the first to re-form herself in accordance the particular articles of faith, doctrinal codex, and theological anthropology up to the present date, that we are – in fact – in keeping with the Catholic faith in our declaration of independence. 

     As the Reformed Catholic Church, we also – by virtue of our very name- acknowledge and celebrate the unceasing process of re-forming which we understand to be the work of the Holy Spirit; ever making things new. The following passage from Romans underscores this ongoing activity of the Spirit, the continual re-forming that takes place in the very core of the Church whom we are:

     In reference to the freedom found in Christ, Paul uses the metaphors of groaning and suffering [liken to labor in birthing anew God’s Kingdom] to describe the continual reformation necessary until that day in which we have been formed into the fullness of that Mystery:

Creation itself will also be set free from the bondage of decay into the glorious freedom of God’s children. For we know that the whole creation groans and suffers together until now. Not only this, but we ourselves also, who have the first fruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we eagerly await our adoption, the redemption of our bodies.~ Romans 8:22-3

      The Acts of the Apostles, outlining the manner in which early Christian communities lived out their faith, is yet another among many Scriptural portraits that render a portrait liken to that of the Reformed Catholic Church. “Church” was quite explicitly understood as the People of God in the name of Jesus Christ, lived out. In this sense, practically speaking, where the faithful were gathered – in one another’s homes and various other places of a far more organic nature than what would come to be a faith of “Churches” – Christ was present and communities were both united in the evolving universal catholic faith as well as independent of one another in per the notation of worship in domestic settings. This is the model of “Church” which speaks of Holy Paradox.                

     We look to the earliest forms of Christian worship and see within these movements both a universality and an element of independence and re-formation in accordance with the spirit of each community. The Pauline writings of Scripture, in their diversity – one of tone, context, etc. – are a testament to this and an attempt to both retain unity in One Spirit while celebrating the unique spirit of each Christian community. Universality weds to qualified diversity in the theology of Paul; each community partook in the catholic faith and drew from this participation from the same fundamental Source while the manner and form of this participation was clearly indicative of a level of difference that bespoke independence. What this clarifies is the two seemingly opposite poles as being one, held in a divinely suspended Holy Paradox. This paints the unambiguous portrait of independent communities united in the universality of the essentials of the catholic faith. We see this present in the earliest records of Christian worship and lay witness to a model that the Catholic Church of 320 A.D. would inherit herself, and moreover, to an even more clearly independent “Church” in the institutionalizing of the faith as in possession of the particular articles of faith that declare a status of independence, strength and clarity, and grounding.

     As the Reformed Catholic Church we understand ourselves in light of each of the models stated. We are members of the one, holy, catholic and apostolic church; drawing heavily from the earliest models of Christian practice as recorded. Furthermore, we are a valid embodiment of the Catholic faith – in the corporate sense- by the manner in which we do articulate particular articles of faith [the most fundamental are no different than those clarified with the establishment of the Roman Church]. We both have drawn from the Tradition the essentials, without serious cause to question core articles of faith, as well as hold positions which we – in light of the re-forming nature of our vision of Church – have come to understand as some very clear points of divergence from our sister Churches, noting our unique aspects.

     In the coming together of the breadth of the Catholic Tradition, present to the good news we have come to understand and articulate within our own Living Tradition, we are Reformed Catholics; and Catholics who will ever re-form ourselves under the guidance of the Holy Spirit. To be a Holy Paradox of this nature is our collective “yes”  to the call of the Holy Spirit to become – and continue to emerge and reform as – the Catholic faith as it has been indelibly marked upon each of our hearts.

     It is the fruit of Charity that springs forth from the Truth as we have come to understand and to name it, so too is it Charity which channels the good news of the Reformed Catholic Church through the human heart as it is shared with our sisters and brothers in other ecclesial forms of the one Catholic Church of which we are members. To be prepared in the many instances of question and scrutiny, it is always by virtue of the love our Catholic faith calls us to embody that we open up dialogue as to who it is that we are and why we have come to name ourselves “Reformed and Catholic.” In so doing, we remain open to the Holy Spirit in the other and the life of the R.C.C. continues to be lead by this Spirit; manifest and validated by the most important of sources: the fruits of our life together authoring transformation in the lives of countless people everyday.

                                     REAL, RELEVANT, ACTIVE
                                      By Monsignor Michael Baremore

 Greetings and Salutations! Hola!

     From my last article in September, you may have surmised the "Girls" (my canine companions) and I were in deep in Mexico by now, getting started for the new season in our mission work. However, it would seem the Creator had something else in mind. I received a call about six weeks ago from Archbishop ++Phillip Zimmerman and ++Bishop David Frazee one morning. It seems there had been some changes in the structure of leadership with our diocese of Divine Mercy. Holding each of these shepherds of our faith in very sincere and abiding respect, I also had become accustomed to “change” as a constant; I knew I was heading into the proverbial wood shed or worse!  Fortunately, neither was the case. Standing in my office, I listened, stunned while ++Phillip lead the charge, as usual.  After some general discussion, the heart of the matter came to surface and he asked if I would accept the responsibility of the Chancellor of the Diocese of Divine Mercy, under Bishop David. If this was not enough to take my breath away, in the same dialogue,  ++Phillip asked me to be his Nuncio to the People of Mexico.
          In ten minutes many things had changed in life. Stunned, still teary eyed and now sitting flat on the floor, barely breathing....Reality slowly dawned on me just what these folks were asking me to do.  A flood of thoughts hit first: You must be kidding, not worthy, why me of all people with so many others more qualified, how am I ever going to do this while living in Mexico – Who – What – Where – and most troubling, How?!?! I finally decided to chill out, surrender the burning anxiety that God always seems to have a way of chilling us out, and, in the gradual calming of the Spirit to pray for a week or so. "Be Still and Know I am God" became for me so much more than a touching reflection from Holy Scripture; it was a time set apart to live into the words in my own life and discernment during this pivotal time. Learning, gazing, praying, attending daily Mass and being present to moments of strong consolation, I found a peace within me that brought greater clarity as I reflected in the work of researching roles and responsibilities. All of the week flowed from the stillness and touched the anguish of my mind with an indescribable peace; that “peace which passes all understanding.”  Wrapping my mind and heart around the idea of our diocese of Divine Mercy is – in itself - quite the challenge.  But the idea of an entire country is a very different thing altogether. Oh, but what an incredible country it is!
          As a community reflecting the early Church, the "tent making preachers,” we must work to support our lives and ministry. My secular role is as a food and beverage manager here in San Antonio. I came home to South Texas last spring for missionary furlough, peace and quiet, really needing down time after two full years out of the country. Naturally, I anticipated a return to my home and life in Mexico this fall. So I got a low stress job bartending (perfect confessional, by the way!). The “list” was set: catch up on bills and with  family and simply find time for rest. Well, the job has now morphed in to full management position during the course of this summer.  Slowly word also had gotten around that I am a priest with the RCC and some of my mission life is in Mexico. In the course of this job, you can imagine I have been blessed to meet many, many folks from all walks of life and experience.
          Exactly ten days prior to my return to Mexico, I was approached by several folks in our community here in San Antonio seeking more info on the RCC and perhaps to discuss the formation of an RCC parish. These women and men are seeking an authentic means of living into the reality of, and, celebrating the expressions of their life in Christ honestly, in sincerity and inclusive of all looking for a space of peace which, in the presence of others, becomes for us – “Church.” San Antonio is the ninth largest city in the nation. Many count more than 70% Roman Catholic AND Hispanic here. Once people began to understand the mission and ideas of what the Reformed Catholic Church is all about, a confidence was built in me about coming to me to see what we could be done locally. This area is so truly hungry for the Bread of Life, woven into the everyday application of a real faith, a relevant walk with Christ and an active way to live that ideal out.
          OK, Jesus, now what??!! Five days later the owner of the club I work at, came to me and offered a place to hold our initial services each Sunday. We must start somewhere...then a church organ fell into our laps! Even a slow one like me can see what is happening here! Hmmm! Indeed a pattern is emerging here....Vestry, location, priest and a strategically geographical correspondence at the gateway to Mexico right here in South Texas;  a  passionate mark of communion/reconciliation for this part of the US and for Mexico. 
          During these several weeks trekking in prayer, research and moments of true wrestling -- I see several "realities" emerging. ++Phillip has been discussing the RCC as an “Emerging Church” -- REAL, RELEVANT and ACTIVE . Emerging Churches are places of exploration and a place to meet the real, relevant and embracing Christ, without the foibles and misnomers. It is apparent that many in San Antonio, in the words of Saint Augustine are so very restless searching for that interior/exterior place where the supernatural element meets God dwelling in the human soul, seek  - in addition to merely “reading the faith,” actual ways to live out these "realities" in daily application.

            The words of Our Lord in the Corporal Works of Mercy speak so profoundly to the spirituality in service that embody the ministry which would lay the groundwork for all that would follow:

For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, a stranger and you welcomed me, naked and you clothed me, ill and you cared for me, in prison and you visited me.

Then the righteous will answer him and say, Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? When did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? When did we see you ill or in prison, and visit you?                                                                                                          

And the king will say to them in reply, Amen, I say to you, whatever you did for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for me.

       These are the verses I was ordained a priest under and these are the verses that guide and direct our lives each day as the People of Christ Emerging. So to that end, I am humbled, startled and eternally awed by the sheer grace of God to announce the birth of a new RCC parish here in San Antonio, Texas. Naturally, the local community has deemed it important to name this new emerging parish --  Saint Anthony Reconciliation:  A Reformed Catholic Community of San Antonio, Texas, after  the patron saint of San Antonio. We seek your prayers and blessings in this journey. Our community has started meeting together, learning, praying and will start gathering for public mass towards the beginning of November.

       However, it is the First Sunday of Advent we will officially begin regular services open to the public stemming from our present community.  Pray for us. I must admit a bit of trepidation, as well as excitement of an impending birth, as we move forward. Much of the inner demon of doubt speaks of my sense of a personal lacking of skill adept enough for the task at hand. I find my peace, however, in the reality that the Holy Mass is not fundamentally about me; I am present as a humble servant trusting the One whose direction we follow. Besides, the Creator loves using fools to confound the wise.  "Here am I, Lord!”                                                                                                                     

       This will be a journey of faith for sure. The Roman Church locally are already asking about us and we have not even gone public as yet. Texas just got its first Hispanic Roman Cardinal. So the adventure is afoot! The Roman Archbishop here is a committed conservative, however seems a man of compassion as well.  With many of the same intentions of the first Hispanic Cardinal from Rome, I will set about living the Gospel, administering the Sacraments, and, what marks the footprints of my pilgrimage from my brother priest of the Roman Tradition is that I will not be held back. I will speak freely and listen with great care to the People of God under my pastoral care; “Church will be understood” in a way that underscores its familial and warm aspects for we come to find in healthy Churches,  a strong emphasis on family dynamics and life-long formation [a major shift from the Church of Rome after Vatican II]. Furthermore, without fear I will be not only permitted and  encouraged but quite directly instructed by Our Lord and his instrument , Archbishop Zimmerman and the Council of Bishops,  to call all to the banquet prepared for every one of God’s children. Those amongst us most scarred by previous denominational affiliation will find in the ministries of this diocese a place to call home in the Church.

                The journey will be a real adventure, indeed. I hope to visit all of our parishes within Divine Mercy very soon. Prior to my ability to make formal visitation, contacts of introduction have already begun and I am thrilled with my sisters and brothers in their ministries and thank them for their support of my recent designations.  Naturally, I will be in Mexico as soon as possible too, but traveling more through out the greater country, sharing more about the RCC there, while home based in San Antonio will be the primary station of ministry as visitations and scheduling plans are carefully set into place. We will be planning several short term mission trips into Mexico, in addition to my singular pastoral visits, later in the spring too. I hope to be in Guadalajara and Mexico City as the first two sites in missionary outreach. Better get your passports ready! Much love to our global RCC family, surely we will be in just about in every continent very soon. Let us utilize our excellent RCC communication tools. Stay in touch! We lift each of you daily and looking forward to hearing of your growing communities. Reconciliation, diplomacy, open and prayerful patience are virtues tools necessary for our spiritual lives. What an amazing faith walk. Each of us walks here, let us pray for each other rejoicing. Much peace until we gather together next.

Understanding Suffering from the Sufferer’s Perspective

By Rev. Fr.  Krisz Alekzandor

        A good first step in trying to understand how suffering is felt by another is to is to come better appreciative the nature of the others’ perspectives in light of one’s own; to build a foundation of knowledge about an individual. Logically, we each are different people; we each have our own talents, adventures, understandings, comprehensions, appreciations, etc. The list goes on and on. The coming together of all of these different aspects of who we are allows us to approach life in a way in which we can better understand both ourselves and others emotionally and spiritually. We worship the same God, but we may understand and appreciate God in different aspects, based upon what we have gone through and the effects of our personal histories in relation to our primary “God Image.” An artist may appreciate and value the rich symbolism found in the aesthetics of Catholicism, while a more ‘judicial-minded’ individual may associate spiritual comfort and fortitude in the rubrics and canons of the Church, etc. Perspective merely means from ‘our point of experience’ and that is what makes and creates our reality. When we come across others and we ‘experience’ their anger or suffering, we are being exposed to their belief system from their perspective. Gradually, the efficient pastoral caretaker comes to a point in his/her ministry where genuine empathy is present; the understanding of perspective then becomes a deep feeling of connection with the other’s pain.

          Sadly, there are many clergy who are not interested in taking the time to be exposed to a ministry of such intensity; opting out of filling their duty and instead trying to force the people to just accept the pastor’s reality and to put away their ‘sinful ways.’ But, if these pastors would take the time and allow themselves to be exposed and present in empathy to  the feelings and emotions of the suffering of others,  what an awesome witness to the Spirit do these men and women of the Church become!  To walk upon through this “narrow gate” in ministry is to become as Christ had [and as we are in membership in His Mystical Body]- and by understanding the perspective of others, we all come better appreciate the creativity of God.

                As noted, we often become bull-headed and refuse to try to understand others, and instead reach out with advice and only our perspectives on life, all the while completely ignoring the feelings and emotions of those who seek out the work we are called to do. However, we estrange ourselves from actually being helpful to others, and true to our vocations, when we deceive ourselves by perceiving our way of life as the only right, and the way of others, as wrong. We do not become witnesses to God’s saving grace by bombarding those we are seeking to help by forcefully feeding them. Instead, we need to merely be there for them, listening to them, appreciating them better and simply being present. We often presume that if people could “feel” our joys, our blessings, our loves- they would drop their way of life and follow us. We read in the Bible that the disciples did this for Jesus Christ when he called unto them to follow him, and, so we often wrestle with the notion that if people had enough faith then we they would follow our way of life as well. The difference, however, is that Jesus not only took the time to understand the human condition and to experience it in every way save sin, he did so, as both fully human and God-Incarnate. Compassion, from the Latin [to suffer with] is the core of his person in all of its humanity and an example of the Mystery in which he forever partakes.

                We must ask ourselves then, in particularly challenging situations, the perennial question of the Christian Faith: what, Lord, would you have me do? To gaze upon the Cross of Our Lord from this perspective is to enter into an exercise of the deepest kind of empathy and understanding of suffering from God himself. executed in the most demeaning of  ways. To pray with our minds resting upon the Passion in our prayer, we do indeed see more clearly where others were coming from. But “for those who have ears….” having heard the Good News comes the time in which “we who live on this side of heaven,” minister now to the spiritual and emotional needs of others. Compassion expands when we reflect upon it in this way. It expands in a way that we are not always comfortable with. On these occasions we must look to the Sacred Heart of the Crucified One, radiating Gods love. To this One, who loved us from before the worlds began,  and will do so unto life eternal, we pray in radically dynamic empathy; in solidarity with the Christ in true compassion above all things.

A Reflection from the Gardener’s Soil +

By Rev. Fr. Moore

Father Moore of Living Harvest of Living Harvest in Oklahoma has suggested that  the following beautiful meditation translated into English from German in 1855 be woven into the Pax Press Newspaper to accompany Psalm 46: 1-11. Father Moore has made note that “Be Still My Soul” is a wonderful musical accompaniment to wed to this reflection. It is material to be freely circulated –moreover- it is in its simplicity a message of great profundity. Let us all open ourselves to the Silence that is so often the Language of God. Dates and references cited immediately below.

Thoughts Along The Journey..."

Altar Boy .... Errmm ... Altar Girl???

By Rev. Fr. Warren Taylor

    Many of us have come to recognize and to accept the word Acolyte as the proper terminology for an "Altar Server". And while it is the "proper" term for this position; many of us who grew up in a Catholic / Catholic School past still find ourselves still saying "altar boy" in reference to the young little assistant to the Priest and Deacon. I know even I am guilty of this... or at least I was.

    What changed my perspective to this nomenclature is the fact of one Sarah Ruth "Bug" Taylor, who on September 23, 2007 will be mandated an Acolyte by Bishop Patrick Batuyong of St. Michael The Defender Reformed Catholic Church. To say she is elated by this news would be the absolute understatement of a millennium. She has practiced, went over each and every part of the Mass, learned her steps around the Altar, and learned all the terms and names for almost anything in and around a Catholic Church.

    Now while it is not a new thing to see a little girl serving in this position these days; this is no ordinary little girl. Of course I will be quite objective here and let the cat out of the bag... "Bug" is my daughter. I could tell you how proud I am of her but that in itself would also be an understatement. Even since she was a baby, she has never stopped amazing me. I have heard it said over and over that there is a bond between little girls and their daddy. I must confess that I feel that far beyond that, "Bug" (Sarah) was sent by God to teach me as much as I would ever teach her.

    She got the name "Bug" the day she was born. I came out of the delivery room holding her so that everyone in the waiting room could see her; proclaiming that she was cute as a “doodle-bug”. It was a done deal, the name stuck. It was almost two years before the "doodle" part just seemed to fall away on its own leaving her just "Bug". Her first attempts at talking was telling anyone who would listen that her name was Sawah Rooff Taywer but that her Daddy called her "Bug". Never ashamed or resentful, it came from her daddy and that made it ok.

    She always seemed to be one step ahead of me as I tried to teach her things about the world, life, God, Jesus, colors and scary things. As she has grown, I cannot think how many times I have stopped and just thanked God for how blessed I am for having her in my life. My worries for her have always been met with peace and understanding as I have seen her gain in knowledge and in her own small wisdom.

     Passing through the mall at Christmas and wondering how do I teach her the difference in the commercial world and that of Christmas' true meaning... When my thoughts are interrupted by my daughter pointing to a ceramic in a shop window of a kneeling Santa at a manger and her response of, "See Daddy, even Santa Clause loves the Baby Jesus." I can honestly say that even to this day I have never hid my tears from her. Hugging my daughter there in that mall and thinking how profound her understanding is... yes, I am indeed very blessed.

    When my physical abilities began to slow and stop me, I worried how could I be the father that "Bug" needed when I could no longer run and play with her. Her response, "Its ok, you are still my Daddy." Did I mention the tears? It was "Bug" who nicknamed my cane the "boogie stick" and my wheelchair, the "wheelie chair". Through it all, not one time has she felt any less loved or deprived in any way.

    Now for the record, I would not have you think she is perfect, or an absolute angel. She is a child and has her moments. They are not many and are far in between. I would not have her any other way... I just won't tell her that... for now.

    Her greatest joy right now is knowing that her "Father Pat" (what she is allowed to call Bishop Patrick) is making her an Acolyte... an Alter Server. And her reason this brings her joy... She will be allowed to serve at "my" Ordination in October. For her this is her chance to be part of this service for me... her daddy... on his "special day". I guess there will be no end for my tears.

    My comment to her that I didn't think I had ever seen an "alter boy with pig tails" was met with her signature reply..."Daddddy!!...." I love her and I cannot wait to be part of her "special day" on September 23.

    "Bug, I love you and I am so proud of you. God Bless you always."